“At the end, the only thing you see, is sky intersected with a lightning.”

β™ 

There are days, when I don’t feel like I am a neat person. Most of the times that happens during the days when I don’t even feel like crawling out of the bed. I surely am not a Sunday morning person ( maybe also with the emphasis on today, because while I am writing these words, I am at work) and surely not s Friday sunset person either.

Why?

Because, I don’t know if you can imagine, the feeling when you know, the weekend is near, weekend maybe full of adventures or just a regular bed- like one, you just feel the relief after a long week full of stereotype, the sunset washes away all the problems and you simply wanna go on a little bit more- well, why not?

I do sometimes feel like Wednesday 1. am tho, while listening to drunk people chattering below my bedroom window, I feel like a broken mind lock on March. Listening all the time to my bones, slightly cracking, every time I turn on the other back, at least for fifty times that night and all the other nights too. I fall down from the bed in full elegance with a muffled smack and still finding excuses for my awkward sadness.

roller coaster 2

Sometimes, I have to leave my house without nobody noticing me, completely alone, wandering around town on my roller skates, trying to avoid people, just because I have a feeling, that I don’t belong there. I tend to think I belong to all the made up day, that didn’t even happen for real. Then I sit down on a bench, listen to music or to “whatever-the-place-I-am” sounds. I am waiting till the light and darkness mix up together- whether in my mind or in the outside world. And, at the end, the only thing you see, is darkness intersected with a lightning. But, damn- those echoes- that feels just splendid and sad in the same way.

♣

Well, as you already know, there are bad days, but at the end, the effort to make your day better, whether it is your attempt or attempt of somebody else?

Two words- Worth it.

Just give it a try.

N.

 

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