Can you hear the silent whispering of hope?

“They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for”

There are morning when you wake up and think of all the people who sat next to you in a bus or train or whenever. Then you switch to people who sat next to you on purpose with their fingers crossed (even on feet) with a little light of hope that you will talk to them. Even though you think there was nobody like that, there certainly was somebody, I am sure. I mean, there were also plenty of times when somebody walked past you and hope you will stop by and talk to them, but you never did, either you didn’t have the guts or the other person didn’t.

There is a tendency of people, walking around their town, thinking that nobody love them and they don’t deserve love. Well that’s freaking not true. Have you ever thought that some stranger on the street might have been thinking “hmm she’s my type” but again, the lack of courage is here and makes your body disable. You have to learn that you have to just come to the person and open your mouth and I dunno say something silly to make them laugh…don’t throw away the opportunity.

I understand that we all have different lives and going through things differently. We are all carrying some shit in our lives, even if it’s visible or nah. In talking to people, you get to the point when you get to know them and realize that you’ve gone through something similar in your life and you don’t even know what a relief that is!
You know why? It gives us hope
And I think that this is it, we are supposed to talk to other people, get to know them, find people that fits us like no one before them but most importantly- get something what we are supposed to get from them- the hope that maybe, it will everything be okay at the very end.

Enough is enough.



P.s: So stop looking at the sky that much and rather look into peoples eyes…still trying to learn it. I am just a human.



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Running Too Fast Might Exhaust You


She once told me: ,,There are times when I find myself in a situation that I don’t really understand what is happening with me, when I just sit here in front of my desk staring to the window and listening to some sad song on Youtube. I am simply searching through my emotions and my sate of mind at that time and I what did I find?  Exactly nothing.”

Dealing with these ⇑”problems”⇑ nowadays is really individual. I mean, you don’really gonna get it all at that particular second because you are not some “higher entity” or a “emotional superhero”. You are just a human and as a fact, it takes a day or two to process stuff and “get to it”. Just like you can’t always run from one specific place and come to a long distanced place in just few seconds.

Well as a matter of fact, I was trying to explain how hard is to be a human, with so many mind twists and mood twists like you are changing your socks…every single person handles their shit in a different way. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s like really freaking hard but if you wanna live a normal life, better do something with it.

BUT- it always takes time.

Or- have you ever got to that situation when somebody started telling you something, but didn’t really explain it till the end? And even though you asked so many question, not even then you came to some reasonable conclusion? This is something similar- things take time- the person needs its time to think of a way to get it out and you can’t rush it.

I don’t know how about you, but I am always trying to be patient and honestly, still learning to wait and not doing things with a “warm head”.

Those things may teach you how to be a little more patient with yourself, deal with things a little bit differently, with your own speed. It doesn’t matter that other peoples lives are heading fast forward, you don’t have to be the one who’s gonna be trying overtaking  them just because you need to get ahead of them, just because of no reason (ego stuff maybe?). Things are happening in different situations, times, periods- and you will figure them out sooner or later, without even wasting your time or whatsoever.

If you need rest, just slow down.
It can only give you the energy, not take it away from you.


Ah oui vous êtes saint vous…


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GUIDELINE: How to wreck your world in just few points


Have you ever imagined your life as a timeline of some milestones? (Nah, not that Facebook shit *groan*) Well, if not, you did a good job so far, because it is not like that. You are expected (from every single side) to finish your school (even though it is okay, if you won’t), get married, have (a successful) job, start a family and just live in a comfortable way in some certain age.  In my opinion, it’s not a rule, that everything from that „life bucketlist“ have to particularly happen.
You are allowed to explore yourself, your needs, desires, your interests – but as a mater of fact, people forget about it, because someone at the very beginning once told them, that life is supposed to be a „program“.  By program, I mean – go to high school, end it with great success, and in such a young age choose your „life carrier“ at some university. Go through it (like it’s a easy path, oh my) even though there are situations, when people might not be that satisfied with their chosen major. Then finish up with the highest degree you can possibly achieve, go out find a job- try hard and then try harder. Then next stop, next stop…and so on, thinking that you are filling up some „life list“ while you are just doing something you are expected to do from the very beginning.
And now, I am gonna tell you a secret- One day, you’ll end up being so sick of it all, because deep inside of you, you’ll feel that this is stupid and you’ll be waking up depressed because your life you’re living just like others, like a blind sheep in some dark cot, filled up with other misfortunate ones. The stressed out mind of yours will be visible, even though you’ll want to hide it. You will be under so much pressure and won’t even understand why.

Do you really want to see your life in ruins?

(1) Let’s say you can do a lot of things that can destroy your world and leave you a wreck. Well, there is a posiblity you can ruin your life by choosing to be with a wrong person.
People tend to jump into relationships just like that, they are not even thinking before they literally step into the dark not knowing where the bloody pit, they’re gonna step in, is really situated. This is a major problem nowadays- people not thinking, taking quickly the first thing universe gives them, not waiting, not getting to know each other – just jumping into undiscovered areas. Thinking only about things that are not that important, not realizing that people are tools for destroying too.
Then there are people, the desperate ones, who need to find that one person and stay with them just because they can’t be be alone (no, not at all) Do you know on how many levels is that wrong? Maybe on every single one- a childish happening, indeed.
It is an adult sign, if you are able to be alone and still feel okay with it.
Be alone.
Eat alone.
Sleep alone.
Go out alone.
If you master those things first, then you know you’re ready. Don’t be desperate for a realtionship, don’t become a wreck by running after something that supposed to come naturally. Just wait for it, and then – it will turn out to be worth.

(2) If you are a reagular reader here, then you’ll know, I used to talk a lot about past stuff. Do you know why I don’t do that anymore? Because I didn’t let it grow through me. I killed that tile- yes, it happen, from time to time, that I see some new browses in the ground, but as much as I’ve learned, I have to systematically kill it all and surely, can’t let it define me, under any circumstances. If something happened and you think it broke you, no, it jsut broke a little piece of you, on the inside. You are always strong to go on, because nothing is that bad, that it can’t always be worse.
Remember that.
You have to allow yourseld to let go and move on. You will never redo and relive those moments and memories so…You are becoming an adult and you have to manage yourself to go straight forward and you won’t look back for toxic happenings, that poisons your mind over and over again.

(3) Have you ever be scared of stop feeling? Well, that happens too. People are desensitizing their life, simply said.There are situations when they are afraid to say something that they really want other (or him/her) to know, but then let go of it, just because of the scare of the reaction is overwhelming their voice. It is always the same with feeling towards people- falling into it too deeply or showing what they mean to them. Nowadaysm a word caringis synonymical to a word foolish. Yes, the truth is, it makes you vulnerable- it is very easy to step on it and crush it, in few seconds, just like that. You can’t deny it, that’s how true it is.
Personally, I think there is no shameabout it- So, (if you gain enough confidence, and I hope you do) tell him what you really meant when  you laid back to back in bed yesterday night. Tell your mom you love her, eyes to eyes, because you know she’d be so fucking happy, you can’t even imagine.
Express yourself without being so afraid because of this, this, and that. There is no bigger courage than come clean and open up in front of the world.

(4) Because one day you maybe realize that you are doing everything the way it destroys you, you are sitting in the cold corner and quietly tolerating it. At the end of the day, you are supposed to celebrate to be alive with someone you love (even though it is just your cat or dog). You can’t settle down for less, when deep down you know you can do much better and this is just not enough. That’s how you kill your potential and desire.
So I advice you- don’t let things like that happen to you, if you love yourself, at least a teeny tiny little bit. Do not try to fucking cut your life into pieces of debris.

You can always do so so much better than this, you just have to open your eyes wider and do not let anything to sneak behind your back without you noticing it.
Always be one step ahead.

Because when you got down here, you can surely do that.



↑One of my favourite ones↑

When not a morning person talks about mornings


I’d say, that 9/10 mornings are slowly becoming accomplishments, just with the waking up part and turning like 6 alarms off. Well, this phenomenon started a very long time ago. At least for some of us. It all started maybe at the period of time when you happened to be aware of your inside world.
Maybe when you turned 15, the mornings were like walks to the mail box outside of your house and back to your breakfast.

Then after some time, when you turn 17, the waking up part seems a little bit harder, let’s say it’s similar to walking through crowded place while trying to fight wind, blowing against your…everything. The fact is, that you don’t always feel happy and alive, but sometimes, when you leave for a weekend, then happen to end up in friends car, singing along to some stupid song, laughing at stories that happened like hundred years ago, and even though the windows are down and you are feeling a little bit cold, it doesn’t bother at all because this moment will make you feel better and fuel you at least for upcoming week or so.

Then one day, you are a year older, thinking of the things that made you feel warm last year, ended you high school this year, a very big step. Suddenly, there is a switch and you don’t care anymore about shit, so you create a smile on your face- just for you. Take a sip of your coffee and move on with your life.

,,Fuck, I am 20 today…” – That’d be a thought when you wake up at the morning , but 2 years later. You’re standing in the kitchen, making yourself breakfast, still drinking coffee like you used to and listening to that one song that really squeezes your heart- you don’t even know why. You’re just standing there quietly, munching your food, yawning at some point, trying not to look at the big watch hanging on the wall. You are supposed to leave in a bit, for university or work or shopping for groceries (and that looks really unavoidable now). So even though you are supposed to go, you’re still standing there, thinking of the old books in your shelf that made you feel excited. The thing is, you don’t feel that excited at all today.
Do you miss it?
Is this mood happening just because it’s morning?

This needed to happen- those 5 minutes of nostalgia were inevitable. You are realizing you will never be that 15 year old “baby” with no real problems and hell, this is the first time you are this old! You unfortunately don’t remember all the things that happened on your way here, but you know what?
It doesn’t matter.
The song is over.
Finishing up your coffee.
Breathe in and breathe out.

Well, again, with a smile on your face, you’re glad that you’re still here and you even though so many things happened. Realizing that most mornings you get out of the bed, are enough.

At least for now…


P.s: Maybe it’s better to be a night person instead *haha*.


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…but if you do it right, once is enough.


Nothing that happens, doesn’t happen just like that. Story, its causality rooted in a geniality of a time passage, can’t be created and destroyed just like that. Idleness- at some point- doesn’t exist. You can’t avoid things that are supposed to happen, not even if you’d try to elude it with the hundred-mile boots.

It’s like when you’re running on the rock paving and the adrenalin in your blood blocked rational side of your brain, obscured the real reality against which you’ve been running. Complete shut down of a human being. The body becomes just a motley pile of emotions, a soul torn into pieces like a rag- with which you just wanna wipe down your own clumsiness. When you know it’s too late, when you know that the feeling, which you are embalming inside, is just another tight loop, getting even tighter on your neck. Those feelings will be hanging on that loop, the same loop that is suffocating you every night, just before bed time.

When you look the person in the eyes and the familiar look–  you can see the light, but the thing is, that no one’s home.

Well, let’s say it’s all life. And there are theories that weirdly,  it has no point. Is that really the truth? I know, there are a lot of people who claim the exact opposite, but I was thinking today and I just got this to my mind:
You can always choose to see this from two different ways. As the first one- after discovering this, every single person would just say the exact same thing: ,,If there is no point, why the hell I am still here? Why do I even bother?…it doesn’t even matter anymore.”
OR, you can say to yourself that even though there is no relevant point, you know what is important in life, and this is certainly not. Life matter just like it is and we were given this one opportunity to live it, so why to brag about shit, if you can live it the best you can?

God, how I wish to take back the time to my past when I was thinking about so many things that weren’t even important at all and I wish I had this state of mind while I was there- I mean, life is about perspective, people.
In every single situation you go through is presented to you from so many different ankles – well the trick is, to always find the one that suits you the best.

Life can be so tricky and messed up, but you have to go through it, because remember- only one chance is here for you.

So stop waiting. Stop trying to find the next secret door that will lead you to your real life, because you still think that this is just a dream. This is it. There is nothing else out there. I am sorry.

So you’d better decide to enjoy every single day or you should go through your life with miserable feeling wherever you go.

Life is about choosing so try to choose the best for you.

Rise and shine honey,



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