“I met you for a reason”


After hearing this sentence for the first time I immediately thought of people that I will never forget in my life. We do not even have to talk anymore, but you left behind something that made me the person I am today.
Like, have you ever imagined that someone who made such a huge impact on your life, actually never came near you? Do you think that your life would be the same? Ahh, those questions…after all, everybody’s a hero after the fight.

But out of the general point of view, there are people who come to your life that you, on one hand, will never forget even though they are not in your life now, but on the other hand, there are also people who you would be glad that are not in your life anymore, just because of the toxicity of their nature.

As a matter of fact, time goes by so fast, sometimes you do not even realize and one month pass without you even really noticing. My point is, that sometimes (maybe just accidentally) you are forgetting to value those people who are surrounding you. It doesn’t have to be just about the forgetting, but you just simply don’t do it for some unknown reason. The things is, that as long as they are here, appreciate them, make them see it and most importantly never miss an opportunity to tell them how much they mean to you.

Then there are those people that you meet at the most unexpected times of your life, get to know them like a back of your hand, spend a scary amount of time with them and then it hits you and you start thinking about the other side of the card. I mean, you look at them and a sudden thought comes through your head, like- “Damn, it’s gonna hurt so bad when they leave…” But after all, then you shush this thought with a simple “Oh my, I prayed for this and I can’t believe it’s here. It’s happening.” And everything bad just leaves.

In life we meet so many people- like those who give us the best memories, that you will tell your children one day, even though when you met you were just two empty trains entering even emptier station. Even if your railways split at some point (which is always an option) you will follow the way with a feeling that both your presence but also your absence might mean (or meant) something.

We need at least one person in our lives who understands what we do not say. Even if we send just a picture or a song to them, they immediately know what we are trying to say. It’s understandable because there are days when you don’t know how to express yourself, and that’s completely normal.
Those people surround themselves with this notion that I have always wanted to experience – meaning, that it is amazing how some of them can feel like home. It is not a rule that home needs to be just a house and it happens that you feel homesick for them.

Those people touch you without even touching you.

Those people who you think you knew even before getting to know them for real.

Those people who understand every single corner of your mixed up mind.

Those people are insane but important.

..because two souls don’t find each other by simple accident.

I firmly believe we met for a reason, whether it was for making each other happy or for help. I will never stop being a decent person even though there were times when I really wanted to stop, and appreciate them in the best way possible.

That’s my plan- what’s yours?


Pics source: Tumblr


Night night

Sometimes I am asking myself- “Is this really all I can get from you? Is this really everything? A cold shoulder?”To be honest with you, the feeling of not being wanted (enough) is one of the worst ones in life. 

Those are the thoughts that keep you awake at night, even though you want to sleep so badly.

But then you turn on the other side of the bed and there are the little things in your head, suddenly appearing in your mind, just out of the blue- like a kiss of your hand just before sleep or a good laugh about some unimportant shit…the mutual understanding at some point or even a slightly interesting topic of a conversation still make you believe in a better future of yours.

And that one still make you smile, admit it.

Then you turn back and see the back of his, facing you in a innocent state of deep sleep, and you know that there will be a new sunrise tomorrow. At least you don’t have to be insecure about this one. 





She finally got a question she wanted. He asked her what can he give her that she never ever got before.

“Stability.” – was her response.

“If you want to give me something, that I have never got from anyone else, please, do not give me mixed signals and miscellaneous feelings, because of which I am gonna be just insecure and nervous. I am tired of being insecure. If you want to be with me, you simply have to stay here by my side. All I need here is feeling stable.


Cloudy Friday and Occasional Numbness

“I’ve been waiting on you, just to say something real…”

Honestly, sometimes I am not a big fan of Fridays. But listen, don’t scorch me on the stake yet. It is most of the time when I have to stay in this little town, all alone, sitting in my room staring to the wall or to the computer because there is nothing better to do. But I also think that this “phase” is just some kind of autumn mood. Or maybe not. I didn’t really want to give away some of my thoughts lately because it would be still the same I guess, numbness filled up with no time.

Stereotypical Friday in this case, walking, to make it to the very very first lesson at university, while there’s still “dark” outside and coming back home under the drape of darkness again. A long day that didn’t really tell me nothing. No progress, no mood at the end of the day, even though the day was quite decent. I am having those states of mind from time to time, but maybe it’s just because it was a year a few days ago when I started to feel the way I still sometimes feel. Sometimes the nostalgic shitty stuff catch your feet for a few minutes and you catch yourself reminiscing and playing those memories in your head. But enough of this bullshit, it will never happen again. Grow up.
Saying “so what” really frees you, just have to brace yourself and go through it.

Today was the day, that maybe most of you experience from time to time- She came to see me and we started to talk. She was brief -The day when you’re walking home, feeling numb after the day and even your shoes seem to be really heavy, and we are not talking about your head completely filled up with thoughts. Seeing a young couple saying goodbye at the bus stop, realizing that you miss a ordinary hug from him. Simple as that. Missing a normal talk with him. Missing the warm feeling that you can actually really feel.
When he doesn’t even care that you two are not talking at all, just when necessary. That’s the thing that flies through your head more often in last few weeks. You know, trying to convince yourself that there will be no harm if you just make yourself to finally ask it when you know that it lays in your stomach for some time now.

Why are you still so fucking scared to ask a simple thing?
You want him to ask you something real?
Do it then?

Still no progress even though you were laying next to him at night, you cried because you were such a coward and you didn’t do it…and I note- again.

Are you scared of the answer then?
Tell me.

Shit happens.

There are things you can talk about over text, but this is not one of them I guess. Time is slowly sprawling and one month flied away and there are still untold things hanging in vacuum like nothing happened.
I think it is not the best thing to do.

Sometimes it hurts when you don’t know what to do. There are things that take away your sanity during lonely nights and you are too tired to deal with them, so you go back to sleep.

The dark place is spinning and the curtain is falling onto the ground.

There is nothing left to say just- we will see. 



Inevitable individuality of the well known character

Not needed this time.
I am sure you can relate.

Well there will always be one thing that will tear us all apart (in a good way mostly)- and that thing is  called individuality. I know, I know, the regular talk about being different and people are supposed to be themselves and stuff…yea I know that and I am sure you know that too.
It has always seemed weird for me, that people wanted to be somebody else than themselves and tried to act like someone who is their role model or a pop star or just a older cool girl living next door.
Like, honestly? We all did it, even though you won’t admit it, you did.
When you are aging and  trying to find your identity, trying to create your own opinions, settle at that one point that will suit you, making a nest full of your things and your life- long story short – creating your own state of mind that will indicate it’s yours and anyone else.

There will be times when people will not particularly understand you and you will feel the freaking feeling of misapprehension. But you have to understand, that not everyone understands how your mind works, like basically nobody gets that, maybe just you. Maybe you will discover that one missing piece of you who will totally get you, your mind twists and stuff like that, but that’s just a mystery for now.

The question will still remain:
,,Why don’t you believe in things and opinions of other people?”
,,Because I do have mine and they don’t really have to be the same as yours.”
,,Because I am allowed to have different opinion than you. That’s it.”

People may not get why are you worried all the time, or why are you scared of certain things. They will think you are weak- minded and that you are such a weak person in general because, those things makes you weak, right? You are allowing fear to get into your system and it ends up with some shit happening. Well yea, but actually sometimes being worried doesn’t show your weakness, just that you care a lot with a passion burning like a fire.

Sometimes you will laugh on things that may not be funny for other people and they will look at you like “wtf is this girl laughing at? she’s weird…” and you will laugh on the stupidest things ever, because that’s you and that awkward silence in front of you may make you a little bit more self- conscious.

At some point of your life you will figure out that you are a extroverted introvert.  One day it’s okay and the another it’s not. There is no intention to hurt somebody, it just happens from time to time and nobody’s planning on it because plot twist– people like that still exist.
Some people will try to convince you that your big heart and goodwill are something poisonous, that those things are just a simple weaknesses for you and that’s why there is something wrong with you? And what about your quirkiness? Did they tell you it’s a flaw? Nah, it’s not- you are not counting their flaws  either so why the hell would you listen to somebody who does?

I know you are just having the best intentions. You may not always looked like that on the first sight but inside…it is something completely different. At least some people have said that before. It is always different once you get to know the person a little better.

You have to remember that some people won’t see the best in you– they will call you names, they will let you down, they will betray you, but there is a secret that a lot of people know and went through- some of them will. 

That’s one of the most valuable happening.

So, do you know yourself well?




Nina S on My Trending Stories